It was a research post that I planned
on doing today, and it was research post that I am going to do. It’s so nice
when you have a set goal and objective in mind, isn’t it?
Well, that cozy feeling didn’t
last so long for me. Simple reason, I couldn’t decide on the darn topic for this research post of mine. I did one
on dragons last time, and one on crossbows months before that. What could I possibly do this time?
Swords? Not in the mood for sorting through medieval stuff. Spiders? Yeah… maybe later. Definitely later. The
Flying Dutchman? That’s coming pretty soon, not just now, though. Stay tuned.
But for this one, I had not a clue what I wanted to do it on.. Then, my muse tossed in its bed pulled the cover up to its chin. Before it drifted off again, it murmured:
"Darned *mumble mumble* roaches... *mumble*"
The light bulb finally lit.
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| Mu-hue hue hue... |
And so, the roach it is.
I must warn you... this post is not for the faint
of heart. It is for the warrior who craves victory, the general who would learn
of his enemy before striking, and the conqueror who would vanquish his foe. Know
thine enemy, my apprentice. Know thine enemy.
Let us begin.
The first thing you have to know
about roaches is that… not all of them are bad. Yes, you heard me. There are an
estimated 4000 species of cockroach on the planet, and only about two dozen out
of them are the sort of pests that like taking a nap inside your cereal box. And
the rest? They mind their own business, living in the caves and burrows of the
great outdoors like all good roaches do.
Ever felt that twinge of
apprehension before opening the doors to the space beneath your kitchen sink?
Good instincts, or maybe bad experience. They tend to nest close to water, and
if the pipes under your sink have that ever present leak, chances are you have
squatters on the premises.
Another disturbing roach fact
for the day: they can survive decapitation.
Like they weren’t creepy enough,
scientists have proven that roaches can last for weeks without their heads. See,
they breathe through a network of tubes called tracheae that open through spiracles (tiny openings) all over their vile little bodies. Ergo, they don't need their heads to breathe.
They do eventually die though,
because without their head, they can’t eat nor drink. And while they could last
up to a month without food, they would succumb to dehydration much sooner.
If that's not weird enough for you, Wikipedia also says that the detached
head could survive for a few hours more, too. It even waving its antenna about from
time to time. Ugh. Die, just die, darn you. (shudder)
At the end of the day, though,
and as loathsome as they are, it eventually becomes sort of fascinating to read
and study cockroaches. I mean, see what they like, what they don’t like, what
makes them tick, how they could survive nuclear annihilation…
Um. What’s with the wide eyes? Don’t
tell me that... you’re saying it’s just me, then?
Anyway, whether or not you find
them fascinating, you would definitely rather not find them running across your
table or anywhere else within eyeshot. And if you’ve got a roach infestation,
it’s not going to be easy to get rid of them, but it can be done.
You’re not going to get anywhere
until you can pinpoint their nest, though. And while you’re out laying your
traps and spraying the wrong places, the critters would most probably be holed
up inside and having a grand old time.
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No post about roaches would be complete without this honorable mention: Edgar the
bug, the guy from the first ever Men in Black movie (played by Vincent D'Onofrio) Dude loved roaches, being
a giant alien cockroach himself. Actually, it was a giant alien cockroach wearing
human skin and cavorting around the movie, and in my opinion, Vincent was downright hilarious in this one. We’ll probably never get
a villain like Edgar ever again. Sigh.
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| How this thing could fit in that skin we will probably never know |
And I guess that’s it. As always, there's a lot more stuff about roaches that I did not mention. There's the fact that some can bite you (but they don't... if they do, its a genuine mistake) and the other fact that certain tropical roaches have a wingspan of about 7 inches. But I figure that you (and I) have had about as much about roaches as we can possibly stomach... (sorry. Bad pun)... so I'll leave it here.
And well. I’ve… I guess I've got to go clean my room. Believe it or not. And fix any leaky pipes. And get some traps
ready. After all... better safe than sorry, right?
Sources:
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